Wait for it.... I'm a free bitch! No no no, why am I calling myself bitch like hello, who does that, but we all know we act like a bitch at some point or another right. Don't lie, I know you do. *wink wink*
Anyway, since the major exam that I've been preparing for almost 2 years is over, I feel an awful loss of motivation in life. I mean most people feels a sense of relief, some what a liberation of the torturous jc life but i don't have it. I feel like i don't have something to work hard anymore. Ok you might say that, you can get go find a job what or think about uni etc. 1. Im still in a dilemma whether i should work or not because of my condition. 2. See my grades first, what if i have to retain......
As I have more free time, I reflect about my actions, the way i talk and etc, i can conclude that I'm just weird, people don't understand me (so they don't like me or neglect me at time) but i can't help it. As if I can force myself to think like what you want me to think, sorry no. But you know what, i try to be as "present" as i can be already, if its not enough... idk what else i can do. Although i know some people only take advantage of me when they need me, if not I'm probably invisible, at least i know I'm useful in a way. No I'm not complaining about whoever, just an observation. I always have the same problems since young so its my issue and not others. Dk why i so self conscious also but its in my blood. I may be wrong but well we make mistakes. Weird people maybe have weird blood thats why i have such condition lol. Wait, weird = unique so I'm unique in a way. Everyone is special in their own way so yay I'm special too.
Aiya, i think all posts sound like i complaining, feels so hard trying to be neutral sigh. I should quit blogging soon, coz my words don't make sense because i don't make sense anyway. Should shut up and say bye. :/
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